Saturday, May 31, 2008

This is my idea of useful Information...

In the 23 years of my life, I have reached this conclusion:

1. There are different types of smokers.
2. Smokers comprise of the following:

a. The type's that flick the ash every two seconds.
b. The type's that don't ash at all and get some kind of perverse pleasure in ensuring that the ash doesn't break off and fall.
c. The one's that like to smoke with a flair, right out of a bond movie.
d. The one's that let out the smoke from the corners of their mouth.
e. The kinds that let out the smoke from their nostrils.
f. The one's that always have their thumb placed on the butt of the cigarette.
g. The one's that like to impress everyone with their ring blowing antics.
h. The type that places the cigarette inside a nostril, inhales and blows out smoke from their mouth.(bravo!)
i. The one's that make a small little 'poof' noise when blowing smoke out.
j. The kinds that like to talk with a cigarette plastered between their lips.

I'm guessing there are many other kinds but since I have never been the smartest and am still not the smartest, I probably must have missed out on many other styles. As and when I come across a unique smoking style I shall add it in the list above. If you do know of any other kinds of smokers, please feel free to leave a comment and you can be rest assured your information will be of great help to me (I might even include your name in this Nobel Prize winning blog of mine). Till then Auf Wiedersehen!

[Note to the general audience - The images that I have posted are not my own. These have just been randomly selected to suit my posts.]

Friday, May 30, 2008

Promote Fiction

Did you actually take the time out to read all the shit that I have written in my other blog posts?? Most of what I write is only fictitious bullshit. I mean who gives a shit about writing down whatever is happening in my daily life, whether I'm happy or sad, what I see, what I learn, what I feel...blah blah blah. Everyone's got messed up lives so why should my life make any difference to some poor, bored soul who's happened to stumble across this hellhole of a page of mine? Why on earth do we think it necessary to write about these silly little things (ooh my mother yelled at me this morning, ohhh I'm so lonely, aaah why did he leave me and go?) when there's so much more going on out there? I'm not reading a person's blog to see what goes on in their miserable little lives, I'm reading a blog to find out what goes on in a person's mind.

If I wanted to write about my life and what I feel and what I think, I'd just write a book, find myself an agent, get it published and voila we've got ourselves the next bestseller!! It doesn't work that way you see, no one really cares about what's happening to you and what your going through and what your thinking, not even those bored housewives. Even the few people who do read your petty little lamentations, do so because they are putting themselves in your place. They don't care about whats happening to you, they care about whats happening to them, if they were you, and if you were them, if that makes any sense to you.

I mean we all are lonely, we all are sad, we all are happy, we all are glad. So writing a blog on how lonely or depressed you are isn't going to change the fact that you are in fact just that - lonely and depressed. So cut it out. Bring out the demon in you. Don't let go, you got the psycho in you! Oh me Oh my! yes I'm fine! All I'm trying to do is promote fiction!

[Note to the general audience - The images that I have posted are not my own. These have just been randomly selected to suit my posts.]

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

A conversation between two people with very weak minds..

[16:14] Saneth Kumar: but don u think the bible is a little too much?
[16:14] Saneth Kumar: whats with the Garden Of Eden n Adam eating Eve's cherry
[16:14] Saneth Kumar: oops.. I mean...
[16:14] Saneth Kumar: Adam eating the forbidden tree
[16:15] natasha.bantwal: forbidden fruit
[16:15] Saneth Kumar: why the fuck did god put a fucking forbidden tree in his own garden??
[16:15] Saneth Kumar: are u sure??
[16:15] Saneth Kumar: I think there was a tree full of forbidden fruits
[16:16] Saneth Kumar: eating out of the forbidden tree
[16:16] Saneth Kumar: I'm pretty sure... they were eating out of something or someone else.. and god had a problem
[16:17] natasha.bantwal: no Eve ate the forbidden fruit
[16:17] natasha.bantwal: the apple
[16:17] natasha.bantwal: that the snake offered her
[16:17] Saneth Kumar: I know its an apple
[16:17] Saneth Kumar: but inside the garden only na?
[16:17] natasha.bantwal: yup
[16:18] Saneth Kumar: I'm pretty sure the snake found it in the garden.. coz snakes are not capable of cultivating food
[16:18] Saneth Kumar: so my question is... why did god put forbidden fruits in the garden??
[16:19] Saneth Kumar: even if the snake managed to get the fruit from outside...(from the forbidden garden probably)
[16:19] natasha.bantwal: yeah the snake found it
[16:20] natasha.bantwal: or maybe the snake was a peddler
[16:20] Saneth Kumar: so basically.. god put it in the garden..
[16:20] Saneth Kumar: well.. maybe
[16:20] natasha.bantwal: he wanted to test our obedience capacity
[16:21] natasha.bantwal: or maybe god is the devil himself
[16:21] natasha.bantwal: and devil is god
[16:21] natasha.bantwal: and they are both one entity
[16:21] natasha.bantwal: like our good conscience
[16:21] natasha.bantwal: and our bad conscience
[16:22] Saneth Kumar: yeah
[16:22] Saneth Kumar: wow from sex to philosophy
[16:22] Saneth Kumar: some bro sis duo we are!
[16:23] natasha.bantwal: hehehehehhehe
[16:23] natasha.bantwal: dude but that made sense!
[16:23] natasha.bantwal: god and the devil are one!
[16:23] Saneth Kumar: yeah I'm pretty sure..
[16:23] Saneth Kumar: god is like us only
[16:23] Saneth Kumar: some idiot sitting up there.
[16:23] Saneth Kumar: I mean c'mon man...
[16:24] Saneth Kumar: if he was soo powerful... don't you think he'd stop all the shit happening today??
[16:24] natasha.bantwal: exactly!
[16:24] Saneth Kumar: don't you think he'd stop all the senseless violence that happens in his name!!
[16:24] natasha.bantwal: or maybe he put it there on purpose to teach us a lesson
[16:24] natasha.bantwal: I don't think god can control us
[16:24] natasha.bantwal: he just teaches us
[16:25] Saneth Kumar: well.. then its stupid to call him the all knowing benevolent all powerful GOD!!
[16:25] Saneth Kumar: what has he taught us?
[16:25] natasha.bantwal: exactly why I prefer to be an atheist!
[16:26] Saneth Kumar: u know..
[16:26] Saneth Kumar: have u read about satanism?
[16:26] natasha.bantwal: a little
[16:26] natasha.bantwal: I just know a brief bit
[16:26] Saneth Kumar: I found out that satanism isn't about worshiping the Satan
[16:26] Saneth Kumar: the Satan is US!
[16:27] Saneth Kumar: we worship ourselves...
[16:27] Saneth Kumar: n we do what we feel like
[16:27] Saneth Kumar: no abstinence
[16:27] Saneth Kumar: do as we please.... as long as we dont hurt anyone while we're at it
[16:27] natasha.bantwal: I thought by US u meant the united states
[16:28] Saneth Kumar: hahaha
[16:28] Saneth Kumar: no
[16:28] Saneth Kumar: yourself I mean
[16:28] natasha.bantwal: yeah well I wouldn't have to read about it to know that I'm Satan
[16:28] natasha.bantwal: spell my name backwards
[16:28] natasha.bantwal: natasha
[16:29] natasha.bantwal: ah Satan
[16:29] Saneth Kumar: wow..
[16:29] Saneth Kumar: never looked at it like that
[16:29] Saneth Kumar: MY LORD!
[16:29] Saneth Kumar: your wish..
[16:29] Saneth Kumar: is my command..
[16:29] Saneth Kumar: Ah Satan
[16:29] Saneth Kumar: !!
[16:29] natasha.bantwal: ooh that feels good!!
[16:29] natasha.bantwal: what if I ruled the world one day?
[16:30] natasha.bantwal: can u imagine what a pleasure haven it would be?
[16:30] natasha.bantwal: there would be no wars
[16:30] natasha.bantwal: I'd grow trees
[16:30] Saneth Kumar: I swear!
[16:30] natasha.bantwal: plenty of food
[16:30] natasha.bantwal: lots of love making
[16:30] Saneth Kumar: and I as your loving bro would get all the pussy in the world!!
[16:30] natasha.bantwal: exactly
[16:30] natasha.bantwal: anything u wanted
[16:30] Saneth Kumar: there'd b sooo soo much love
[16:30] natasha.bantwal: anyone u wanted would be yours
[16:31] Saneth Kumar: aww thanx
[16:31] Saneth Kumar: I'm not greedy
[16:31] natasha.bantwal: and I'd talk in Shakespearean tones
[16:31] Saneth Kumar: just 2 would do
[16:31] natasha.bantwal: and wear robes of black with red sashes
[16:31] Saneth Kumar: erm..
[16:31] Saneth Kumar: o..k..
[16:31] natasha.bantwal: and wear my hair band with the red horns
[16:31] natasha.bantwal: not the pussy cat ones
[16:31] Saneth Kumar: I dunno why thats necessary....
[16:32] natasha.bantwal: wouldn't do to have the people calling Satan a pussy would it?
[16:32] natasha.bantwal: its all about the garb my underestimated minion!!!!
[16:32] natasha.bantwal: have you never heard of the proverb "clothes maketh the man"????
[16:32] Saneth Kumar: oh rite..
[16:33] Saneth Kumar: well.. dont expect me to dress like a pansy just cuz I'm your bro
[16:33] natasha.bantwal: erm
[16:33] natasha.bantwal: well there's a hitch there
[16:33] natasha.bantwal: see u know how I love to take your arse?
[16:33] Saneth Kumar: so?
[16:33] Saneth Kumar: u want me to dress like a jester?
[16:33] natasha.bantwal: so
[16:34] natasha.bantwal: I was thinking of appointing you as court jester
[16:34] natasha.bantwal: ooh you read Satan's thoughts!!!!
[16:34] Saneth Kumar: how am I supposed to attract women dressed like that
[16:34] Saneth Kumar: ??
[16:34] Saneth Kumar: erm.. we're in 2008 baby... I don think we need them court jesters
[16:35] natasha.bantwal: but if I had to rule the world
[16:35] natasha.bantwal: you'd be a court jester alright!!!
[16:35] natasha.bantwal: and trust me them jesters get more action than you right now!(cuz your getting none at all)
[16:35] Saneth Kumar: aww
[16:35] Saneth Kumar: orgy's n all
[16:36] natasha.bantwal: exactly
[16:36] natasha.bantwal: its like Doink the clown
[16:36] natasha.bantwal: he's probably mounting a rump right now
[16:36] Saneth Kumar: ermm... yeah I'm sure
[16:37] natasha.bantwal: and we'll have our gladiators
[16:37] natasha.bantwal: or would you rather like to be a gladiator?
[16:37] Saneth Kumar: well its more macho... but I'm pretty sure I'd get eaten up by them lions in my first fight
[16:38] Saneth Kumar: so.. I guess.. jester is better
[16:38] Saneth Kumar: wait a minute
[16:38] Saneth Kumar: would you set the lions on my ass??
[16:39] natasha.bantwal: thats what Satan would do eh?
[16:39] Saneth Kumar: but I'm the Satan's bro!!
[16:39] Saneth Kumar: wtf?
[16:39] natasha.bantwal: oh yeah i got carried away...

[Note to the general audience - The images that I have posted are not my own. These have just been randomly selected to suit my posts.]

Tuesday, May 27, 2008


Thank you warm beds
Thank you Mimi
Thank you thank you long showers

Thank you issey miyake
Thank you father for ruffling my hair
Thank you thank you disgusting morning milk

Thank you walking with music
Thank you nice rickshaw guys
Thank you thank you early morning smiles

Thank you every morning traffic
Thank you waving school children
Thank you thank you music

Thank you air conditioned rooms
Thank you sweet old man
Thank you thank you meebo

Thank you window by my desk
Thank you clear blue sky
Thank you thank you buttermilk

Thank you telephone calls
Thank you rui
Thank you thank you friends and brothers and sisters

Thank you situations
Thank you complexities
Thank you thank you alcohol!

Thank you cigarette breaks
Thank you lunch breaks
Thank you thank you all kinds of breaks!

Thank you individual thoughts
Thank you personal flaws
Thank you thank you tears

Thank you concerned friends
Thank you lost souls
Thank you thank you the child in you

Thank you Indo-Aussie chicks
Thank you bespectacled friends
Thank you thank you shopping sprees with 'you'

Thank you guitarists
Thank you heroin addicts
Thank you thank you big mouths!

Thank you bizarre conversations
Thank you sexual connotations
Thank you thank you mood swings

Thank you desperation
Thank you frustration
Thank you thank you voiced opinions

Thank you evening times
Thank you white lies
Thank you thank you emotions

Thank you crude jokes
Thank you laughing faces
Thank you thank you depression

Thank you togetherness
Thank you happiness
Thank you thank you aloofness

Thank you calamities
Thank you paranoia
Thank you thank you phobias

Thank you dream world
Thank you physical pain
Thank you thank you dancing!

Thank you late nights
Thank you big fights
Thank you thank you family.

(I could just go on and on and yet we say life is a bitch)

[Note to the general audience - The images that I have posted are not my own. These have just been randomly selected to suit my posts.]

Saturday, May 17, 2008



[Note to the general audience - The images that I have posted are not my own. These have just been randomly selected to suit my posts.]

Friday, May 9, 2008

mad rantings and ravings of a non-believer...

If God turned His back on us for a Day.....

If God turned His back on us for a day, the little child who so wished for that toy truck, wouldn't get his toy truck and would grow up to be a bitter, world-hating freak of nature with a hatchet in his closet and a dead body under the floorboards of his pantry...

If God turned His back on us for a day, the teenage beauty queen wouldn't get the love of her life and would turn out to be a promiscuous alcoholic with bitter dreams wrapped in a bag of acidic man-hating thoughts...

If God turned His back on us for a day, the honest, self-sacrificing parents would give birth to aboriginal monsters with high libidos and murderous tempers, always on the run from the law, always on the run from themselves...

If God turned His back on us for a day, I'd probably be dead and so would you, or worse still, we'd be alive and using whatever means we have to get what we want, what we really want, even if murder would bring it to us....

If we turned our backs on God for a day.....

If we turned our backs on God for a day, the little boy with the big dreams of getting that toy truck for Christmas wouldn't expect God to give it to him, he'd probably take up a summer job and save his money for that truck and buy it all by himself...

If we turned our backs on God for a day, that teenage beauty queen wouldn't be left embittered by the lost love that she never did manage to ensnare and would probably move on in life and go on to concentrate on her career and make a name in Wall Street...

If we turned our backs on God for a day, those honest, self-sacrificing parents would give birth to honest, self-sacrificing, independent children with degrees in medicine and an ambitious gleam in their eye to make it big in the world of scientific research...

If we turned our backs on God for a day, we'd still be alive, just as alive as we are now, writing our memoirs, finding another belief to help discipline us, to help set us on the right path, the path to re-destruction..

[Note to the general audience - The images that I have posted are not my own. These have just been randomly selected to suit my posts.]